1975z:

Can’t believe mark zuckerberg offered to buy snapchat for $3 billion when he could just download it for free from the app store

Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

Carl Jung (via misswallflower)

sorelatable:

hate when i lose something and my parents says “well i guess u didnt care about it enough” like you’ve lost me in a grocery store before 

tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?

new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol

tourist: oh you think you're clever???

new yorker: what

tourist: i'm going to meet my dying neice and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness

new yorker: oh... oh i'm so sor

tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself

the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole